1998

15 – 15

Hallelujah! After a 9 – 18 season in ’97, the combined MPR teams storm back with a solid .500 year. Why? In the absence of other evidence, the credit must go to J.R. Mac’s. A softball team without a “home bar” is like a president without an intern, quoth the historian. And Mac’s provides not only mustard, but FREE BEER! ¶ Of course, the men’s team must be credited, too; relentlessly spurred on by their 1997 Season of Shame, they fought off younger, more athletic opponents and one very testy umpire to post a 5 – 5 record. The co-rec team (6 – 6; 4 – 4) actually won money with a second-place finish in the midseason tournament – a feat that makes the Mark McGwire/Sammy Sosa “Quest for 62 Taters” seem about as exciting as a guy trying to find a lost sock. µ Unfortunately, immediately following the tournament, State Rep. Matt Entenza launched an investigation into MPR’s nonprofit status. “All Minnesotans should be deeply concerned when a charitable organization tries to launder large sums of cash by subverting an innocent, all-American activity such as softball,” Entenza, his nostrils flaring with righteous indignation, said on KTCA’s Newsnight program. Speaking from his villa somewhere in the south of France, MPR president Bill Kling said, “We have a softball team?” ¶ Meanwhile, back on the field, the team soldiered on, helped by another good crop of rookies, another year’s worth of cunning and treachery from the veterans, and the comforting knowledge that at the end of it all, after the windsprints and the pushups and the bad hops and the endless consumption of Advil, they would all get one more glimpse of a rancid butterhead. ¶ The Wick? Purple Guy (a.k.a. Elmo II, a.k.a. The Smoking Eggplant). Worrisome fact: Not a single cry of “No wheels!” Hopeful sign: Fans who journey from afar and actually buy us dinner. Team scandal: child abandonment.

Roster

Captains

Jim Bickal, *Bill Wareham, Linda Wareham

Rookies of the Year

Sasha Aslanian, Greg Dowler

Most Improved

Randy Johnson, Al Schoch

Batting Champions

Tom Rothman, Linda Wareham

Golden Glove

Laurie Johnson

Most Valuable

Jim Bickal

Whippets of the Year

The MNN Brigade

The Historian’s

Hall of Fame

Now entering the Satchel Paige Wing…Mike Anderson (1986 – ) (MVP – ’93; Golden Glove – ’92; Whippet of the Year – ’92)… “The NoDak Knocker.” “The Fargo Flash.” “The MBA Who Came to Play.” Over the years, Mike has been one of the most dependable performers on a team not known for stability. He can always be counted on to hit for a good average, drive in more than his share of runs, and make the tough defensive plays – all with a Zen-like air of ease and nonchalance that would make Satchel proud. Mike has a strong arm, deceptive speed, and a distinct dislike for umpiring. But he never fails to bring a jug of water to the ballfield on a hot day, he never wears his game shirt into a classy tavern, and despite his financial acumen, he never seems to get stuck being the banker. The Historian says: “Hats off!”

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